The Bohan Crew: Happy Birthday Daddy!

A sunset on my Dad's birthday the year he passed away

Taken from his favorite spot on the porch at camp

Today would have been my Dad's 51st Birthday. As my Birthday gift to him, I'm going to post the rest of my tribute to him. Daddy we love you!

One of my biggest regrets is that my Daddy never got to hold my children. I made a promise to myself and my daughter that I would do everything I could to show Emma who her grandfather was, and is to her family. She has a moose that sits on her changing table that her Great-Aunt Pat sent to her, and we call that moose “Grandpa Moose” and everyday we talk to Grandpa Moose, and tell him about Emma’s life that day. Emma holds Grandpa Moose and loves Grandpa Moose. Someday, when she’s old enough to understand I’ll explain to her who Grandpa Moose is. I hope I can do my Father Justice in sharing who he was with my Emma. I watch Brian with Emma, and I know that Emma will one day cherish her Daddy as much as I do my Daddy.

My Baby with her Daddy

Me and My Baby girl

Me and Dad a few days old

My Grandpa is the best hugger ever. My Dad was a very close second; he must have learned it from Grandpa. Of all the things I miss about my Dad his hugs are probably the things I miss the most. Whenever we’d had a disagreement and had to go to the garage for one of our Dad and Alayna talks my Dad ALWAYS ended the talk with a hug. The day my Uncle Don passed away I remember standing in the kitchen in my Dad’s arms telling him how much I loved him, and that I would share him with my cousins so they could still have a Dad to go to. When I graduated from high school I remember my Dad hugging me and telling me how proud of me he was, and again on my graduation day from college – I don’t think there was a Dad who was more proud (well maybe, but I’d like to think there wasn't!

College Graduation

I remember the day I crashed my Mom’s car, I was terrified to tell my Dad even though he said any accident you could walk away from was an okay accident. When I took him out and showed him the car he did two things. First he asked if I had learned a lesson (a very important question he asked whenever I screwed up), and after saying yes I’d learned many lessons, he reached his arm over to my shoulder and pulled me close and hugged me, I knew everything was going to be okay with my Dad, which meant eventually my Mom would forgive me too!

I remember the weekend Brian and I drove to Vermont to celebrate our engagement with my family and my Dad hugging me and telling me how happy he was for us. I remember so many hugs the weekend Brian and I got married, especially during the father daughter dance, and I looked over to see tears streaming down Brian’s eyes as he danced with one of his cousins. I remember the many hugs we shared that last summer – at Martin’s wedding when I was missing my new husband terribly, when I left camp and Peggy and I were bawling our eyes out as we almost always do (especially when I know its my last trip of the season). I’ll never forget the last hug he was able to give me, that alone made the trip home important, if for no other reason than to be hugged by my Daddy one last time. The last hug I ever gave him, I don’t know if he could feel it but it’s a hug I’ll never forget.

Daddy and his baby girl

When my Dad hugged me, he hugged with his entire body; I had his whole and complete attention if only for a second or two. I felt safe, I felt loved and cared about, and I felt like I was his whole world – well sharing it with my Mom and Brother of course. I knew Brian was the man for me because I felt all those things in his arms, and through the three years we’ve been married it has grown, I told him he was the one because I felt safe in his arms. The greatest thing about hugs from my Dad was I didn’t have to ask, in fact quite a bit of the time he sensed I needed one and would say to me “Come on over here” and he’d wrap his arms around me and all in the world would be right for a moment. Even now that he’s not alive I still feel his presence in those moments when I could really use a Dad hug. It’s not the same, but I must say it’s much better than nothing. When I hug Emma I try to hug her much the same way my Dad hugged me, and I hope some day it will mean as much to her as my Dad’s hugs meant to me.

If that isn't a look of love I don't know what is!

My Dad is a very important person in my life, because of who he was, what he taught me both directly and indirectly through our life as Father and Daughter, as Friends. I only hope he knows how much we all love him. I hope he knows how honored I am to be able to say I am his daughter. I think it surprises people sometimes at how comfortable I am talking about my Dad, and his passing. I’m okay with talking about him, because I feel by talking about him, and even by missing him terribly some days, his memory lives on, he lives on. Thank you Daddy for all that you shared and showed me about life! You truly are my Hero.
We Love You! I love you!